The Truth about Personal Development
In the more than 30 years now that I am passionate about personal development, I have learned quite a lot about what works and what doesn't work.
Can people really change? Can one change one's behavior? Can one change his/her temper, character?
Does this industry of personal development really deliver? Or is it all about promises that never really get fulfilled?
What I have seen is that people's patterns run very deep, very deep! It takes huge effort and discipline to really change ones beingness. The key is motivation: How deep is your burning desire to really change the personality that you are?
Few people are really motivated to change. They only consider changing when the environment forces them, like when successively relationships break up or when there is fear of losing the job when they don't change. Most people only get motivated to change when their back is against the wall and they don't see any way out any more.
A lot of them just come to fix a problem: they don't have a partner, they do not have enough money, they don't have the career change that they really want. When the problem is fixed they like to return to their old life and old habits. So basically they are ok with their life, they just have this isolated problem that they want to solve, an inconvenience that they want to get out of the way. They rarely see the whole picture and more honestly, they are not interested in the whole picture. Fixing the problem is like replacing a laptop that you don't like anymore. You switch your PC to an Apple and you enjoy the new features.
So most issues in life are dealt with on a surface level, not dealing with the deeper dynamics and not getting to the core. You can compare it to driving with a 2HP car where you have it just turned into a new one by adding a new layer of paint; it is the same car, it just looks nicer, but underneath it feels just the same. You learn a few tips and tricks, you learn how to play the game, you learn when to speak and not to speak. How to show respect, how to listen,... You learn on a rational level the implications of your behavior and so you adapt. Even on this surface level the successes can be very visible. Rationally based methods, wrapping the mind cleverly around the experiences.
But the being inside doesn't change. You learn how to focus, how to achieve goals, how to use your time well and how to get priorities right. You now have become a formula 1 driver, but you are still driving that same old 2HP car, with its bruises, oil leaks, fumes and worn out dashboard.
Outside you are successful now, but inside you still feel the same, you still have those old frustrations, those emotions of jealousy, anger, guilt, wanting appreciation,... You feel like a puzzle with pieces that don't really perfectly fit.
And then there is a whole different level of personal development, you could call it the PHD of personal development, where you really change your energy, where you change the puzzle and make it fit and turn your 2HP car into a Ferrari. Very few people go for this level. I believe not even 5% of the people who are dealing with personal development issues get to this level. This level demands dedication. Changing yourself like an alchemical process, where you transmute yourself into an new being. This level, which is exponentially rewarding can only be reached when your life has become a living meditation: every word you speak, every breath you take is focused on changing yourself into a new being. This is the ultimate beingness, where you really free your true potential. This is where you are born anew.
But this takes a burning desire to transmute into a new being. This transmutation of energy CAN NOT be achieved by cognitive means or methods. Here only non cognitive ways can provide an answer. Methods that change frequency, that have a profound impact on your energy, on how you feel about yourself, can serve as a gateway for this process. But since our Western Wold worships the cognitive approach, overall only limited change happens. This is also the reason why besides having improved technology, human kind has not really evolved much compared to 2000 years ago. Most are still torn apart by their emotional instabilities just like they would have been thousands of years ago.
So what is your approach to personal development: frequency based or cognitive based?
The answer to this question will tell you how much of real change you can expect in your life...
In Truth
Cris
Cyres
Hello Cris,
Interesting article. I have read it several times now... It gives me a lot to think about. Thanks for sharing and keep on writing.
Kind regards, Linda
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Hi Linda,
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Hi Cris,
I would say, eventually we all want "to be", no matter which training you go to. But I have noticed that sometimes it seems to be the hardest thing of all to do in a lot of cases. While actually it is the most simple and natural thing or as you say, when you are deeply honest and really listen to yourself.
regards, Linda
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